Children as Wedding Guests

It's a question familiar to most brides and grooms, with answers that differ according to everyone's personal situation: should children be invited to the wedding?

Pro: They're supercute and will look great in the photos
Con: They could easily be in a bad mood and ruin the pictures with their pouty looks

Pro: They won't run up your alcohol bill
Con: You'll have to shell out lots of extra dollars for meals they might just pick at or proclaim "yucky!"

When you have a large family with numerous younger cousins, it can be particularly stressful to decide children or no children. On one hand, brides sometimes feel as if children could "steal" the show from them or don't want to risk the possibility of a child throwing a fit in the middle of the ceremony. However, many guests might be extremely offended at the omission of their children's names from the invititation.

If you choose not to invite children, be prepared for some hurt feelings and having to explain to some guests why you chose this option.

On the other hand, if you decide to invite young children to the wedding and include them in the wedding party, give some extra thought as to seating arrangements and menus.

A major thing to consider is the food. Try to work with your caterer to negotiate a children's menu or a child-sized plate at a reduced price.

And don't forget what children might need most at a formal event: child-friendly entertainment.

One of my friends is getting married in May, and with dozens of young cousins running around, she and her fiance are setting up a special "children's section" at their reception so that the kids can still have a lot of fun doing separate activities without getting bored. It also takes some of the pressure off of their parents.

You could even take it one step further by supplying a children's room and employing a sitter or child supervisor.

Also, when it comes to the ceremony, make sure your flower girls and ring bearers know where Mom and Dad are sitting and that if they need to, they can go sit down with them during the ceremony. For my wedding, we knew that our young ring bearer and flower girl were definitely not going to make it through the whole ceremony standing up with the wedding party, so we had them practice walking down the aisle and then finding their parents, who were sitting conveniently right in the aisle seats.

So before you erase the children's names from your guest list, just be sure to put some thought into how you could arrange things so that they can be a part of your special day and everything can still run smoothly.